Lately...

Lately, there're so many things that i have to do. Sometimes i wonder, why do these people want to burden themselves by doing things that aren't supposed to be done at all? Then at the end, more problems are created. Im tired with all these. Hmm...i guess i dont understand their intentions. I feel like going somewhere, relaxing my body n mind, for a while. But, it is impossible. I can never run. Im stuck on the ground n i cant fly.

CUDA..

Waiting..

Waiting for u to come back....i miss you.

CUDA...

SICK..

Im not feeling well today..I guess i pushed myself too hard for others..I need to rest...seriously.Ive cancelled everything...So, im done..

CUDA..

Special menu for today..

Salam to all.

Well,since today i didnt work, so i'd decided to cook, after a while. Hmm..my menu for today, Ikan Kerapu stim, daging black pepper, kangkung goreng belacan, caramel pudding and bubur caca. So, my mum could actually relax today when i did all the cooking...Alhamdulillah...

KERAPU STIM....

For tomorrow, i havent decided on the menu...Maybe, something to do with prawns or squids...We'll see....

CUDA...

Alhamdulillah..

Salam everyone.

Today, i feel much happier n better. Im done, finally, with all the minutes of meetings. Being a secretary for two big organizations is not easy. I have to do this and that.Sometimes i feel my time is never enough, n i need few more hours. Well, wanna make it to 28 hours maybe. Yeah, it is a big opportunity and it shows how much people put their trust in me n they know that i can do the work, that's what they said. As for me, im tired. Feel like rushing here n there.

Despite of feeling better, i also feel happy today. My part time job so far went well. I enjoy teaching the students, n i think this is me, my nature. To teach ,share knowledge n deliver new information to the students are in my bloodline. I cant imagine myself working as doctor, lawyer, business woman or even soldier! Hmm..im very glad n thankful for the job that i have.Alhamdulillah.

They said, it is not easy to be a teacher or lecturer. Yes, i couldnt agree more with this. But, no matter how hard it can be, ill do my best.Actually what makes teaching profession looks hard is, all the non-teaching workload or the admin.'s work. Teachers/lecturers have to do other jobs, other tasks which are not theirs!! Thats why....ISO, courses bla..bla..bla.. n many others. Im afraid i might explode one day, getting sick with all those things.

Allah is GREAT. Even the most impossible thing can happen in our lives if HE allows it. Well, it happened to me last few days. But, im very certain with what i want in this life, so i wont turn my back anymore. Life must go on, no matter what. Besides that, im happy n grateful with the life that i have rite now. I did't ask from others, but i use my own effort to earn more money for my family. Alhamdulillah. As long as i remain as strong as i am rite now, ill survive....InsyaAllah..Amin.

Thank you to my family for the endless support that u gave me, during my darkest hours, during my joy....My family is always there, for me. Thank you to my beloved children, I LOVE YOU two unconditionally, limitless n borderless. What im doing now is for you two....Hopefully both of you will grow up well, n be a good person...better than ur mum.Amin.

And, to u my dearie Lan, Tq for the motivation n support that u have given me. I dunno what the future might hold for us, but insyaAllah,only Allah knows what is the best for us. The deep hole in my heart is finally filled by ur presence.The ups n downs n the uncertainty of what will happen, are part of our lives n relationship. Tq for being there, whenever i need you the most. U know how i feel towards you.Tq once again dear.

CUDA...

Dont care anymore..

I guess i dont care anymore what will happen in the future for i know ive done my very best to deal with every matter. I will go with the flow n see what happen later. Im tired chasing this n that. So let it be...let it be...Ya Allah, plese gimme the strength that i need. I wanna stay strong, even stronger than i am rite now...Amin.

CUDA..

Welcome ya Ramadhan Al-Mubarak..

Salam...ahlan wasahlan ya marhaban..

Welcome Ramadhan..welcome. Im waiting for this ramadhan, when all the good things that could possibly happen during this fasting month, will happen to me n my family. InsyaAllah. I wanna be a good muslimah n servant to Him. I hope n pray that i will get His blessing...Amin. I wanna avoid all the things that can reduce my 'pahala'...InsyaAllah. Yeah....in the meantime, avoid wasting money on food etc...U know when it comes to bazaar ramadhan, everything looks interesting n delicious.Every kuih looks so tempting...so, i will buy the kuih that i want n not the unwanted one.hehehe... Happy Fasting to all of you...May Allah bless our ramadhan n our fasting n our ibadah.Amin.

CUDA..

Afiq's besday..

Dedicated to my son,Afiq.

Today is my beloved son's besday,Muhammad Afiq Farhan...Today, he is 5 years old. I pray that he will be a good muslim, better than me. I pray that he will be a good son to me. I pray that Allah will protect him n bless his life, n hope he will succeed in his life, much better than me. InsyaAllah...I love u so much dear. I pray that Allah will give u a great life n health for i love u,only He knows...Amin.

CUDA...

myMetro | Minda: Bagaimana mengawal amarah

I wanna share with all of u, a very informative article about,How to control our anger... Have a read. Sama2lah kita menjadi insan yg lebih pemaaf...Amin..

myMetro | Minda: Bagaimana mengawal amarah

CUDA...

Doesnt matter...to my loyal silent reader..

Hmm.....i guess i dont care anymore. Let Allah judge me. Who are u to judge me? Ok, im not good, im a sinner, n i repent for everything i did in my past. Be fair please. As if u never do any wrongdoings? How can u be so damn sure about it? Juz because people never say anything about it, or tell u, u can conclude that all people like u? Hmm..i dunno..Coz, i dont care if u have done any wrongdoings or not, but PLEASE, dont talk as if u are so damn perfect..Look at yourself first before you talk about others. I can accept all the things that u said,bout me. I was like that before. BEFORE.BEFORE.n BEFORE. Arent u tired with this?Finding others' faults?You had better think bout u, how can u improve urself to be a better person rather than find time to correct others who dont really need ur synical advice at all...So, dont waste ur time....Ramadhan is coming. It is Juz around the corner. So, I hope Allah will bless us all...n im waiting for His blessing too.. InsyaAllah...Amin.

CUDA...

Much Better..

Starting from yesterday evening,i feel so much better...so much. Today even more. My feeling, is natural now. Tq to you dear, for making me feel this way. Feel motivated, stronger n more positive.How can i forget the way u sang to me? U tried so hard to make me feel better, something that i cant forget..ever. U sang with ur fullest effort, eventho' u know ur voice isnt that melodious n nice, BUT, u had tried ur very best in order to calm me down. Tq dear..tq...I know how ridiculous can it be, doing something that uve never done before, in ur entire life. U put aside ur ego, n never gives up..juz like before..Im sorry for all the things happened, misunderstood..misinterpreted. U r a weird person, the way u think is different from others, u see things in different ways. I like ur point of view n we r in the same boat dear. Thats why we can share our problems..N, u trust me with all ur heart. It seems that u trust me that much, so i wont spoil n ruin ur trust on me. I hope u will be juz fine dear..I pray for u, n my prayer always goes to u. I believe if we have a good intention and work it out in the right way, insyaAllah Allah will help us. I never give up n surrender in this. Fighting for something that i really want, im not gonna give up...

Fighting for this love..

CUDA...

It is cloudy...

I thought the sunny days wont end...they will last long...they will stay there...but, then the cloudy days came, out of nowhere..I have to go through those days, without any hesitation, doubt n regret..I thought im strong, but strong is not the word actually. I thought ive changed my attributes, from stubborn n selfish to selfless and more considerate. But, my thoughts are wrong. Im who i am. Im trying so hard, still im stuck on the ground, n fell down when trying to fly.With such broken wings, how can i expect myself to fly that high? Now, i will follow my mind rather than my heart...Heart can be wrong, but mind, i can make wiser decision...Perhaps..Definitely maybe..

RUN..
Run...im running...running through the winding road
When i see only darkness, at the end of the road.
Run again, trying to choose a different path,
The path that i dont know where it's going to end..
Run again, to reach the ending of the road, when all i see, is only a total darkness.
Im running..runnning....until the end of the endless road.

CUDA..

Little by little..

Ive been thinking n reconsidering a lot lately about so many things. I think, i need more time. Im at fault in this matter. I have to feel the certainty about this one, should feel very absolute n know the reason of doing this. Hmm..what is the main purpose for this? Yeah...im wondering now. Now, i think ive become as the old me a bit....

CUDA...

Missing you..

                                                                     Some words of love

Within you I lose myself...
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again.
~Author UnknownWhat is the opposite of two? A lonely me, a lonely you. ~Richard WilburWhen I miss you, sometimes I listen to music or look at pictures of you, not to remind me of you but to make me feel as if I'm with you. It makes me forget the distance and capture you...by James

You are the sun in my day, the wind in my sky, the waves in my ocean and the beat in my heart... I Miss You...by Anonymous

i love you with all my heart, but i didn't know true love hurts so hard, i love and i miss you, every single second i wanna be with you, i know ill always love you, for there is only one love to me, baby that you, so ill say, im always gonna be with you everyday.......

I miss you like the sun misses the flowers, like the sun misses the flowers in the depths of winter, instead of beauty to direct it's light to, the heart hardens like the frozen world which your absence has banished me to...by William in "A Knight's Tale"

CUDA...